Nǐ zhǔnbèi hào wéi apocalypse ma? (Are you ready for the apocalypse?)
So even though I’m pasty-white enough to be a member of the Cullen clan (complete with the blonde hair and brown eyes) I’m not lying to you when I say I lived in China for awhile. I’ve lived many places and have been exposed to a plethora of cultures but for some reason everything is more entertaining to me when the Chinese do it.
Enter, the doomsday escape pod.
Well, Ubergizmo informs me that a Chinese business man from Yiwu, China has purchased what he’s calling “China’s Noah’s Ark.” While the bright orange orb looks nothing like an ark it is reportedly shock-proof, water-proof, fire-proof, radiation-proof, and built for two. The escape pod – though I’m not sure what the businessman thinks he’ll be escaping to – costs $236,000.
This is where my amusement ends.
All of these expensive escape gadgets are affordable primarily to those who have no hope of surviving anyway. I seriously doubt that this Chinese businessman – or very many other billionaires who could afford a similar escape pod, for that matter – would even know what to do once he survived the apocalypse. I mean really? All that money to live for one extra week? Just enough time to die from dehydration. Or, best case scenario, you survive in once-great city that’s not been tainted by radiation, have access to a limited food supply, water, and shelter but die from starvation over time, or an accident-induced injury. Joy.
And how many of us really have a chance of surviving radiation poising or a massive fire at our premisses? Sure, we blogged about what’s needed to survive nuclear war but the subsequent devastation is rumored to be near insurmountable. Areas that have experienced nuclear bombing are not fit for human habitation for decades.
I’m just saying – if you’re hoping to survive the apocalypse and be the last hope for man kind, don’t just buy fancy toys – have the foresight to learn some survival skills and figure out what you’re up against.