Nǐ zhǔnbèi hào wéi apocalypse ma? (Are you ready for the apocalypse?)

escape pod

via Ubergizmo

So even though I’m pasty-white enough to be a member of the Cullen clan (complete with the blonde hair and brown eyes) I’m not lying to you when I say I lived in China for awhile. I’ve lived many places and have been exposed to a plethora of cultures but for some reason everything is more entertaining to me when the Chinese do it.

Enter, the doomsday escape pod.

Well, Ubergizmo informs me that a Chinese business man from Yiwu, China has purchased what he’s calling  “China’s Noah’s Ark.” While the bright orange orb looks nothing like an ark it is reportedly shock-proof, water-proof, fire-proof, radiation-proof, and built for two. The escape pod – though I’m not sure what the businessman thinks he’ll be escaping to – costs $236,000.

This is where my amusement ends.

All of these expensive escape gadgets are affordable primarily to those who have no hope of surviving anyway. I seriously doubt that this Chinese businessman – or very many other billionaires who could afford a similar escape pod, for that matter – would even know what to do once he survived the apocalypse. I mean really? All that money to live for one extra week? Just enough time to die from dehydration. Or, best case scenario, you survive in once-great city that’s not been tainted by radiation, have access to a limited food supply, water, and shelter but die from starvation over time, or an accident-induced injury. Joy.

And how many of us really have a chance of surviving radiation poising or a massive fire at our premisses? Sure, we blogged about what’s needed to survive nuclear war but the subsequent devastation is rumored to be near insurmountable. Areas that have experienced nuclear bombing are not fit for human habitation for decades.

I’m just saying – if you’re hoping to survive the apocalypse and be the last hope for man kind, don’t just buy fancy toys – have the foresight to learn some survival skills and figure out what you’re up against.

Here’s hoping.

– Wren

 

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About theurbanapocalypse

We are two urbanites on a mission: To survive. We believe that the apocalypse is coming and that everyone has what they need to survive in the aftermath...they just don't know how to use it. Our purpose with this blog is to provide readers with the handy information they need to be prepared. Now before you write us off as crazy; know that we are just like you. Wren is a PR professional living on the west coast. She's active, clever, artistic, has an awesome dog, and thinks that cheese is the best food on the planet. Kennedy is in Finance on the east coast. She's an amazing cook, planner, yoga enthusiast, wine lover, and is the smarter, more down to earth of the two.

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