Travel in style post-apocalypse with this hovercraft
Today has been a day of great discoveries. For starters, I discovered that spilling chili powder on an open wound causes it to burn, that you should always consider a horse’s last 4-5 races at a particular distance before placing a bet, and that dandelion greens are great with a vinaigrette – just don’t eat the stems. More relevant to our usual topic however, is that today we got word that Hammacher Schlemmer is planning to release a hovercraft for consumer sale. OMG.
According to the website the hovercraft will glides over land and water and also soars in the air at up to 70 mph with a little help from some integrated wings. It can scale up to 30% inclines, operate over water, sand, mud, grass, ice, snow, etc and “hop” over obstacles up to 20 ft high. The hover craft can cover 160 miles on a single tank of gas and can be used in winds up to 25 mph or over waves up to 6 ft high. To make even more fun, this baby can support up to a 600 pound payload. Having spent a significant chunk of my adult life living overseas and flying back and forth to see my parents I know that 600 pounds is A LOT OF STUFF (assuming you are a relatively small person). Of course, the $190,000 price tag is a little intimidating.
This hover craft is clearly built from science fiction awesomeness and I would do quite a few unsavory things to try one out but let’s face it – even without having to shell out $190,000 to have one it’s impractical in the long term. Years of speculation suggest that the post-world is not likely to possess an abundance of oil gasoline. While this may be a fairly decent option for getting to a secure location after an apocalyptic event, the second gasoline ran out the hover craft would be most useful as a storage capsule for anything you’d like to keep particularly dry. Assuming the seems don’t leak. But for $190,000 I would hope that they don’t.
Come to think of it, I’m not even sure it would make a great option for getting to a secure location. According to the description you’d never be able to go more than 20 ft off the ground. I’m picturing two possible scenarios: 1. You live in a city and have one of these babies in the garage. Apocalypse occurs so you load ‘er up and take ‘er out. Then you get swarmed because you’re the only person in the city with a bleeding HOVERCRAFT and everyone else is in a panic. That’s no good, no good at all. You’d definitely need a small aircraft instead. Or a hovercraft that could also fly. 2. You live somewhere where it’s unlikely you’ll get swarmed or you’ve waited long enough to leave that everything has settled down so you head out…but somehow or another a giant crater got blown between you and where you want to go. You could walk it easily, the sides are steep but it’s only 40 ft down. Unfortunately the hover craft won’t make it. GAH.
So unfortunately hopes are dashed with this one – too big of an investment, not enough payout. Preppers, I recommend you spend your money elsewhere. It’s a cool idea though – maybe one day there will be a more viable solar powered version. When that day comes I’ll reconsider and get back to you.