Now you too can experience the zombie apocalypse: How long would YOU survive?

Today I discovered something amazing. Typically I don’t put much stock in the whole zombie-eat-brains thing. I find the popularity of the zombie apocalypse amusing and I like to speculate on why people are so fascinated by zombies (I’m torn between it being an inadvertent comment on our pursuit to stand out from the crowd  or it being a more direct comment on the human quest for immortality and the attempts many of us make to evade death) but zombies aren’t really my thing. But what I discovered today was a zombie mall experience. Yes. A zombie mall experience. Read on for details.

*The below represents a more-or-less verbatim conversation between myself and Kennedy*

Wren: Dude. Oh my goddy-god there’s a zombie mall in the UK. We have to go!

Kennedy: Uhhhh…What?

Wren: A zombie mall. These guys bought an abandoned mall and then hired a bunch of actors and they run 3 hour zombie attack simulations. You get put on a team and there are a finite amount of resources and the actors are the zombies and you have to survive in the mall for 3 hrs with what’s been provided and you get to shoot zombies with like paintball guns or whatever. They create all different scenarios and IT’S SO COOOOOL!

Kennedy: *laughs* You really want to do this don’t you?

Wren: Yes! Of course I do! WE WILL ROCK THOSE ZOMBIES!

Kennedy: Well maybe we’ll go together sometime.

Wren: NO! We have to go NOW! Cause the mall is condemned and they don’t know how long they’ll be there. So let’s go immediately!

Kennedy: Right…you enjoy that, I’m going to Uganda. 

So you see, other than the fact that Kennedy won’t go to the zombie mall with me this has been an awesome discovery! And even though it’s unlikely that I’ll ever hit up the mall as I don’t fancy going to London during the olympics I am so sold on this and am officially looking for investors in my new Apocalypse Survival Scenario Training Center. Just FYI. Call me.

If anyone does get a chance to check out the zombie mall PLEASE call or email and tell me about it. Or better yet, take some video and post it then comment with the link. Informational video below! Oh, and I’m pretty sure I would survive this bi-atch. All 3 hours.



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About theurbanapocalypse

We are two urbanites on a mission: To survive. We believe that the apocalypse is coming and that everyone has what they need to survive in the aftermath...they just don't know how to use it. Our purpose with this blog is to provide readers with the handy information they need to be prepared. Now before you write us off as crazy; know that we are just like you. Wren is a PR professional living on the west coast. She's active, clever, artistic, has an awesome dog, and thinks that cheese is the best food on the planet. Kennedy is in Finance on the east coast. She's an amazing cook, planner, yoga enthusiast, wine lover, and is the smarter, more down to earth of the two.

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